The Swede Sample

The Swede




Chapter Ten

“It’s going to be the most beautiful wedding ever.” Carina proclaimed. “Are you hungry Hans?” Carina asked. “I’m starving.” Hans replied. “I’m craving your Raggmunk. I haven’t had that since I left home.” Raggmunk is the name for a Swedish potato pancake. The pancakes are fried in butter and served with fried pork. “I will fix some for you.” Carina said smiling at Hans.  “Thank you, sweetheart, will you show me where momma is buried tomorrow?” Hans asked. “Of course, I will darling, I will pick some fresh flowers for her in the morning then we can go. Carina said. 

We also need to go by my parents’ house. They’re dying to see you as well. Oh my god, Hans I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean it that way. What the hell is wrong with me?” “It’s okay sweetheart, I know what you meant. I can’t wait to see them either.” Hans said with a smile. After Hans and Carina Ate, Hans watched Carina as she scurried around the house gathering items and placed them in front of the fireplace. She had gathered a blanket, Wine, cheese and two candles.

As Carina walked about Hans was almost entranced with her. When she walked it was as if she was gliding across the floor. Her neck was dainty and delicate and her feet were tiny. Carina had big brown eyes and the smile of a little girl. Hans wondered how he ever got so lucky to get a girl like Carina and at the same time wondered what was wrong with her for liking a guy like him. Whatever it was Hans was glad for it, he couldn’t imagine being with anyone else. 

Carina spread out the blanket, started a fire and opened the wine. “Come sit with me Hans.” Carina said patting the blanket. Hans joined Carina in front of the fire. Carina poured them both a glass of wine and handed one of the glasses to Hans. “Cheers honey, welcome home.” Carina toasted. “Thank you, Carina. It is so good to finally be here. It feels like I have been away so long.” Hans said. “You have you jerk. I want you home to stay.” Carina said with a pout. “I know you do Carina. This war won’t last very long and then soon I will be home for good, I promise.” Hans tried to say as convincingly as possible. 

Hans knew that the Russians were putting up a pretty good fight and the way they seemed to multiply their numbers with endless reserves of men, tanks and supplies, they might be in store for a very long war. Carina leaped at Hans wrapping her arms around his neck throwing her full weight on Hans’s shoulders. Hans once again fell to the ground under the weight of Carina’s passionate attack. Hans loudly moans out in pain as his body hits the floor. Oh my god, I’m so sorry Hans are you okay?” Carina asked tense and concerned.


“I see nothing has changed.” Hans grumbled. Carina was perfect in every way to Hans but for one dangerous flaw. She was as clumsy as a drunken sailor. “I’m beginning to wonder if it might be safer for me back at the front.” Hans teasingly says to Carina. “No one back there can take care of you like I can.” Carina said seductively and kissed Hans slow and gently on his lips. “I love you Hans.” Carina said. “I love you too Carina.” Hans replied. 

Carina leaned over Hans and passionately kissed him. Their bodies were pressed together but they both tried to get even closer to one another. They held each other in their arms gently petting each other. Hans grasps Carina’s breast and gently squeezes. Carina quietly moans and rolls her head back. Feeling Hans touching her made her feel wonderful and she desperately wanted more but she couldn’t. 

“No Hans, we can’t.” Carina said reluctantly. “Why.” Hans asked. “I want my first time to be special. I want to be your bride.” “I hope you can understand Hans, it’s important to me.” “It’s okay Carina, I can wait. I have waited all these years I think I can handle a few more days.” Hans said. “Thank you. After we get married I’m going to make you happy over and over again for the rest of your life.” Carina said like a naughty girl. Hans knew that Carina was a woman of her word and Hans was good with that.

The next morning Hans awoke to sausage and eggs being served to him in bed. “Good morning sunshine, rise and shine.” Carina said with a big smile. “Wow, what’s all this?” Hans asked rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. “It’s a thank you.” Carina said. “For what,” Hans asked. “For loving me” Carina replied and danced out of the room. “I could really get used to this.” Hans said to himself then dove in to his food. 

One of the things Hans loved about Carina is that she was a good cook, as good as his mother and no one was as good as mamma. It was so nice being home with all the creature comforts it provides and the food, so much better than the rancid meat and crackers they get at the front. That stuff is only good enough for dogs and Sven, Hans had a more sensitive pallet. Hans finished breakfast, got dressed and went downstairs to meet Carina. 

Carina had already picked a beautiful bouquet of wildflowers to bring to his mother’s grave. “Aren’t they lovely Hans, I just love this time of year.” Carina sighed. “They’re very nice Carina, thank you.” Hans said. “Are you ready to go?” “I’m ready.” Carina said. “Okay, let’s go.” Hans replied. Walking to the cemetery, Carina strikes a conversation with Hans. “Hans, what does it all mean? Why are we here, what is this all for? What is the purpose of our lives?” Carina asked. “I think we’re all put here to help each other. I think we’re here to be as kind and nurturing to one another as we can.” Hans said. 

“Hans you’re a soldier and you kill your fellow man, isn’t that cruel and unkind?” Carina asked. “Which is crueler Carina, killing to keep millions from becoming enslaved or doing nothing and letting millions become enslaved?” Hans asked her. “I see your point, Carina said. It does seem to be the lesser of two evils.” “This is why I can take pride in what I do. I’m a soldier and a good one. I can make a difference and defend those who cannot defend themselves.

I’m helping keep communism from destroying our society. Not to mention keeping innocent men, women and children from being raped tortured and murdered by those damn communists.” Hans said with devout conviction. Hans and Carina continue on their walk-in relative silence reflecting upon the war. Hans’s contemplating his return to the war and Carina, the desire for Hans to return from the war forever.

The following morning, Hans and Carina were just finishing up with breakfast when a knock came to the door. “I wonder who that could be this early in the morning.” Carina said. Carina walked to the door and opened it. There stood two of Hans’s friends and four of Carina’s friends. They were there to kidnap them both for a stag do. In Sweden they don’t have the traditional western custom of a bachelor’s party consisting of drunken debauchery and strippers. 

Traditionally it is customary for the soon to be bride and groom to be kidnapped by their friends for one or two days. The stag do’s (or bachelor party’s) or hen party (bachelor bash) consists of fun activities the group of them can do together as if it was their last chance to play together as free men or women. Normally the other partner knows that this will happen and will lie to make sure that they’re in the right place at the right time. 

Sometimes friends will plan the bachelor festivities to fall on the same day so they both have to try and fool each other. Pulling pranks on the guests of honor is also a big part of the tradition. Hans’s and Carina’s friends grab them by the arms and drag them out of the house to two waiting cars. The men pile in one car and the women in the other. As they drive away the sound of the men singing a silly sea Chianti and the women giggling like a group of school girls slowly fades away.


Hans has known Elise and Erik since childhood and they were the two orneriest guys he had ever met. Elise and Erik took Hans to Kariskrona a port town on the coast. Erick had a friend that owned a large boat and owed him a favor. Hans had always wanted to Captain a ship but had never got the opportunity so Erick set it up so that they could help fulfill on of Hans’s dreams. 

There was only one condition. Hans had to wear a fake beard that Erik and Elise had made for him. “No, I don’t think I’m going to wear that silly beard. Hans said to Erik. It looks ridiculous.” “You have to Hans, that’s the rules. Erik said. Beside all boat Captains have beards.” “Okay.” Hans said reluctantly and put the beard on. Hans spent the day at the helm of his ship. It was fun to live out one of your dreams and Hans was very grateful to his friends for their wonderful gift. 

After spending the day on the water, they decided to go to have a steam bath, another traditional Swedish activity. The three men undressed and got into the bath. Hans couldn’t help but notice that the private areas of Elise and Erick were both shaven. “I don’t mean to pry but I have to ask. Why are you both shaven down there?” Hans asked. Elise and Erick both looked at each other and smiled mischievously then Erik turned to Hans and said. “Where do you think we got the hair for the beard from?” 

“You sick bastards.” Hans says with a hint of disbelief while his friends laugh hysterically at him. “Are you saying I spent the whole day wearing your pubic hair on my face?” Hans asked. “Yes, yes you did.” Erik says while chuckling. “Your assholes, Hans said. Well, you got me. Your dumb asses got me good.” Where hen dos and stag parties differ is in the treatment of the bride and groom from their friends. The object of a stag party is to humiliate and poke fun at the groom as much as possible.

Hen dos on the other hand are about solidifying relationships in an evening where in habitations can be set free under the protection of the group. Carina and her friends had reservations at hotel Concordia in Malmo. Carina and her girlfriends got settled in their rooms and were preparing for an evening out on the town. Carina was in her room freshening up from the trip when a knock came on the door of her room. Carina opened the door and there stood her friend Elsa holding up a bottle of vodka with a mischievous smile on her face from ear to ear. 

Elsa was the bad girl of the group, Elsa was one of those girls that other girls seem to hate and envy at the same time. It was as if her life was one big party and the party was only interrupted by romantic interludes with new men. “Want to have a good time sailor?” Elsa asked. Carina smiled at Elsa. “Get in here silly.” Carina said. Elsa walks in and Carina shuts the door behind her. 

“Where are you girls taking me tonight?” Carina curiously asked. “That is a secret my dear.” Elsa replies. “Come on Elsa tell me, I’m dying to know.” Carina pleads. “Come have a drink of this, it will calm you down. Besides, it’s good for your soul.” Elsa said. “I’m sure it is.” Carina replied and took a drink of the vodka.

After Carina had swallowed a mouth full of vodka she began to choke and gasp. “How the hell do you drink that stuff like that, it’s terrible?” Carina said gasping. “It is just like sex, it gets more enjoyable the more times you do it,” Elsa said with a smile. Carina and Elsa continued to take shots of vodka over the afternoon. Carina wasn’t quite the drinker Elsa was. Carina had lived a little more reserved life.


 Love can’t conquer war, but can it survive one?

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